Suzanne Burke came up with another wonderful image for a flash fiction prompt, one that thoroughly enchanted my muse. If you’d like to participate, check out the rules and deadline HERE. In a nutshell—-750 words or less in the genre or format (fiction, non-fiction, poetry, etc.) of your choice. I always seem to come in right at the 750 word mark, or just under. Today’s count is 746.

FREE Image by Peter H from Pixabay
Atonement
Julian St. Croix. stood on the first step, testing the weight of the rotted tread. Behind him, Rexmont kicked through detritus littering the floor—slivers of wood, dried leaves, tattered scraps of paper. Small puffs of dust wafted from his shoes, tickling the sensitive tissue of Julian’s nose.
He sniffed and dragged a sleeve across his face. “Second floor’s off limits.”
Rexmont stopped long enough to raise his head. “How come?”
“This step feels like rice paper and the others look as flimsy. Too much dry rot to risk it.”
“That sucks.” Rexmont wandered closer. He craned his neck to gaze toward the landing where shadows nested in a pocket of charcoals and grays. “Up there’s where he hung himself.”
“You’re sure?” They’d only been in the abandoned house forty minutes, and already Julian felt the drain on his energy.
“I did the research.” Rexmont swiped a paw over the back of his neck. He was a big man, twice Julian’s size, with massive hands, a chest like a double-wide freezer, and close-set eyes the color of motor oil. Most people labeled him a gorilla, but he was every bit as gifted in intellect as brawn, which was why Julian valued him so highly. If there was friendship between them, it straddled the line between employer/employee, still too new to venture deeper.
“No choice then.” Julian gripped his cane, the anchor that kept him from crumpling when spirit energy deserted him and all that was left was mortal stamina. “You stay here.”
“You’re the boss, but…is that wise?”
“The steps would never hold you.” Julian tested the first one. He was a trim man, not quite six feet, all lean muscle and bone, but still the wood groaned its fragility. Using his cane, he prodded each tread before adding his weight. When he reached the second-floor landing, he paused to glance down at Rexmont. “It’s an old house, but the structure is sound.”
His hired muscle snorted. “You’re two centuries older, at minimum. What’s that say about you?”
Julian’s lips curled. On his worse day, he could still pass for late thirties. “Let’s pray my fortitude is every bit as resilient as this structure.”
Without waiting for an acknowledgement, he ambled down the hallway. Over moldy carpet, once a rich burgundy, now frayed and discolored by grime. Fat cobwebs clung to the ceiling and sprouted in the corners. He followed a pulse of dark energy to a room on the right. The furniture had been cleared out years ago, but Sight allowed him to see the area as it had once been—a king-sized bed, ebony bureau, standing wardrobe, and roll-top desk.
His stamina wavered and he closed his eyes. When he looked again, the desk lay face down, papers and books scattered over the floor. A toppled ink well left a stain like blood on the paisley carpet. Above, suspended from the rafters, hung the body of a thirtyish man with white-gold hair. He had not died easily, his face bloated and purple.
Julian drew a breath to center himself. He bowed his head then murmured a prayer in middle English. When his voice faded, the specter’s form shimmered, outlined by tiny points of light. Within seconds, it vanished.
“Boss?” Rexmont appeared on the threshold. He glanced around the room. “That was quick work.”
Julian nodded, unwilling to say more. The ritual of releasing a spirit in bondage resurrected ugly memories. “How did you manage the steps?”
“I didn’t. I found a second stairway off the kitchen. Are we done?”
“For now.”
Rexmont frowned. “I still don’t understand why it’s your job to hunt down these ghosts and release them.”
“Because they deserve the peace that eluded them in life.” Something he’d yet to achieve.
Thoughts of his young wife and her lover filled his head. Visions of the blood he’d left them lying in before he’d flung a rope over a crossbeam and hung himself. Julian walked toward the door, his cane thumping hollowly against the floor. There was no erasing the sins of his past. Penitence would have to suffice, along with the hope that someday his spirit—like those he freed—might move on.
He paused and faced Rexmont. “I do it for atonement.”
“For you?”
“And them.” For the wife who’d broken their marriage vows, the brother who’d betrayed him by sharing her bed. He did it to erase the violent killer he’d once been. “I do it for my soul.”
This prompt really resonated with me. BIG TIME! I could easily see myself expanding on the characters and the plot line, spinning them into a novella or something longer. Now, if I could only find the time 😉
Thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoyed my latest flash fiction!
WOW! Mae this piece is amazing. The characters shimmer from the page. I would be first in line to read a novel featuring Julian and Rexmont. Kudos, my friend.Thanks SO much for taking part. ❤
LikeLiked by 3 people
I’ve enjoyed all the photo prompts, Soooz, but this one struck immediately. I started writing the same day I saw it and didn’t stop until I was done, LOL.
So glad you liked meeting Julian and Rexmont.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’m looking forward to seeing what else they get up to. ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
I think those 2 are in need of a longer story! Great writing Mae.
LikeLiked by 3 people
Thank you! I’m definitely going to consider putting them in a longer piece. I think they need their story told, too 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Good news!
LikeLiked by 1 person
What an incredible story, Mae. Absolutely amazing! I hope you do find the time to write because you have the beginnings of another masterpiece. ♥
LikeLiked by 2 people
Aww, thanks, Gwen. The backstory with these two characters is what really draws me to them. I’m going to add them to my list of possible new works for down the road. 🙂
LikeLike
So this isn’t an already established story/characters?? Omg Mae, you HAVE to write this. Full stop. No returns. Go now to your computer and get tipppy tapping!
LikeLiked by 2 people
LOL! I spent the weekend tippy tapping on my WIP, but I can easily see these two guys getting their own story (along with lots of dark backstory) down the road. So glad you enjoyed the tale!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Good… gotta keep them fans happy 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh, this is a cool story. I like Julian already, but I’m angry at what he did way back when, but I understand why he did it . . . so much in such a short story! Very cool, Mae!
LikeLiked by 2 people
Julian is definitely a dark character with a damaged past, seeking redemption now. I can’t wait to play with this one, Priscilla—erm, assuming I ever catch up on my current WIP!
LikeLike
Bravo! I loved this and yes, I would very much like to see this as a longer piece. Fantastic job, Mae!
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thank you, Joan. The prompt thoroughly pulled me in and my fingers went flying over the keyboard. Even if I do nothing with Julian and Rexmont for a while, I’m tempted to sit down and flesh out their backstories. Then there’s NaNoWriMo—no, no! Not going there. I’m sticking with my WIP this time around, but these guys are definitely on the list for the future.
LikeLiked by 1 person
You and I think alike. I wasn’t far into the piece at all and I was thinking, “Novel… no, wait, series!”
Excellent story, my friend.
LikeLiked by 3 people
Ah, yes, series! Maybe I could put them in 50K indie novellas. They definitely have a lot of potential for the next project after my current WIP. So glad you enjoyed Atonement 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Very much.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yep, I can see a whole series involving these two characters. I’d love to watch them uncover murders and solve mysteries, lols. Wonderful response to the prompt this week. Well done, Mae! 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Murders, mysteries, and ghosts. I could have such fun with that, Harmony! So glad you enjoyed this one, and I can thoroughly see myself expanding on it in the future.
LikeLiked by 1 person
This was so cool. I’m with the others that there’s room for expansion. Nice work.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, Craig. This is going on my list of stories and characters to develop. Guess I need to start a storyboard 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
You know how I feel about that. I start them even if it takes years to finish one. Grinders was probably a five year board.
LikeLiked by 1 person
WOW! That’s a long development time.
But I love this idea too much to let it go, so storyboard–I’ll start calling them that even if it’s my usual system of notes–here I come!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I have several quite old boards. They will come together someday. I find my stories are better if I let them mature at their own pace.
LikeLiked by 1 person
OH MY, Mae!! That was amazing. Your writing literally brought the characters off the page and into my room. At first, I thought Rexmont might be a werewolf and Julian a vampire, but wow! I’m blown away. YES! Expand this! Brilliant writing!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you so much, Jan. I’m glad the purpose behind Julian and Rexmont being in the house caught you by surprise. I’d really like to find the time to do more with this story concept and these characters. I need to start making character sheets and notes for when my time frees up!
LikeLiked by 1 person
YES! This has the potential to be a fantastic story!
LikeLiked by 2 people
I vote a great big YES for expanding this – amazing!
LikeLiked by 1 person
YAY! Sounds like I really need to devote more time to this possibility down the road. Thanks so much, Teri!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I was thinking much like you – I think it sounds like a wonderful prelude to a novel! It definitely captured my attention.
When I looked at the picture I thought, “This house needs to be gutted down to the studs.” I think I’ve been watching way too much HGTV.😂
LikeLiked by 2 people
LOL! Did I ever mention my career is real estate marketing? I’ve toured some very cool, even historic properties. This house would definitely need to be gutted!
Glad you enjoyed the story. I would definitely love to expand on it in the future. Now, about that pesky animal called “time” 😉
LikeLiked by 2 people
Great imagery and I love the twist at the end, a better meaning than I expected. Nicely done, Mae.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thank you, Jacqui. These characters grew with very little prompting, which tells me they’ll be easy to expand on. I’m glad you enjoyed the fic.
LikeLiked by 2 people
As usual, your style and elaborate word-building shine through the story Mae. Julian already has so much within himself to explore! Just with few concluding sentences, this story unleashes amazing possibilities with a wow factor. Loved it.
LikeLiked by 2 people
What a wonderful comment, Balroop! You have me grinning ear to ear. I am so pleased this story resonated with you. The characters grew in my mind with little prompting and the photo grabbed me the moment I saw it. I hope to explore the possibilities with this one more in the future. Many thanks for reading!
LikeLiked by 2 people
Love this, Mae! I’m glad you said you wanted to expand on this, you left so much to explore. I was thinking they were just ghost hunters but it was so much more.
LikeLiked by 2 people
I’m glad you enjoyed it, Denise. The photo immediately struck a chord with me and spiraled off into the characters. I was surprised when they revealed themselves as ghost hunters. At first I thought reality TV, and then they surprised me and went in an entirely different direction!
LikeLike
🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yep. I’m adding another demand for Julian and Rexmont to get their own book. This is awesome Mae!
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thanks so much, Kim. I really want to explore future possibilities for these two characters.
LikeLiked by 1 person
This is great, Mae. You and I were on similar wavelengths this week.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Absolutely. Only your take was based in fact!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes, my stories usually are.
LikeLiked by 1 person
These characters have so much potential, I could easily see a whole series starring them. You have lots of room for flashbacks and new “ghosts” that he has to free. And Rexmont had just as many opportunities to expand. I want more:)
LikeLiked by 3 people
I would love to expand on these characters. Judi. Your Muddy River series have given me the incentive to spin them into a series of novellas. Time will tell, but for now I’m so happy they’ve been well received. So glad you enjoyed Julian and Rexmont!
LikeLiked by 1 person
They’d make great short reads!
LikeLiked by 1 person
A sensational story Mae. Your writing painted a beautiful tableau. with such a few words. Well done.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thank you so much, John. Your comment has me grinning ear to ear. I loved imagining the setting and bringing it to life through the characters and description. So glad you enjoyed!
LikeLiked by 1 person
You did a great job.
LikeLiked by 1 person
🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
WOW. I know I’ve enjoyed your flash fiction before, but Mae, this is extraordinary. I love it!! And I agree with everyone who said you MUST do more with this. At least a full story, but preferably a book. Maybe even a series. I can think of lots of stories this guy could tell. It’s just wonderfully shivery, and I want MORE. 🙂
LikeLiked by 3 people
Yay! Wanting more is exactly what I was hoping to hear. I really fell hard for these two characters, especially Julian’s backstory. I’m planning on making notes to develop his story and Rexmont’s in the future. I’m feeling smitten, LOL.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Great news! I’d stand in LINE for that! 😀 (Okay, I’d probably rush right over to Amazon, but you get the idea. It’d definitely be line-worthy!) 😀
LikeLiked by 1 person
🙂
LikeLike
Wow, Mae, just wow! I love your description of Rexmont. And Julian… can you feel sorry for a killer? Yes, this would definitely make a good book!
LikeLiked by 2 people
So good to hear, Jacquie. Exactly what I was hoping for, especially in regards to Julian. I’m hoping to expand on these characters and their backstory in a future novel, series, or novellas. This prompt really struck a chord with me. So glad you enjoyed my take on the photo 🙂
LikeLiked by 2 people
I felt your passion from the beginning of this flash, Mae! It felt like a detective story first and turned into something like exorcism. What a twisted ending. I could see the novella in the making. 🙂
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thanks so much, Miriam. I really hope to expand on this idea and characters in the future. I’m so glad you liked my take on it!
LikeLiked by 2 people
You’re welcome, Mae, now you have several folders of WIP books!
LikeLiked by 1 person
What a moving piece with an even deeper surprise! These characters would definitely lend themselves to having their entire story told.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thanks so much, Flossie. That’s the plan. Now I just have to find the time, LOL!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Loved it! So well written. I would LOVE to read more about this character, Mae.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thanks, Sue. This prompt really resonated with me, so these characters and their story are going on my to-write list….erm, as soon as I find the time, LOL!
LikeLiked by 2 people
Another amazing story, Mae. Your writing is so deep with emotion and rich characters. “Eyes the color of motor oil.” I love the originality of your descriptions too. Another one for your anthology! Lol. Well, done.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Aww, thanks so much, Diana. Coming from you, that is an especially high compliment. I am always amazed and mesmerized by your word choices 🙂
LikeLiked by 2 people
Mae, you had me at “Up there’s where he hung himself.” You don’t disappoint! I’ll need to thank Soooz for coming up with these great prompts.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thanks so much, Linda. Soooz had been coming up with excellent prompts, and this one really inspired my muse. I really enjoy doing these flash fictions, and am so glad you dropped by to check out my latest 🙂
LikeLiked by 2 people
I’m glad, too.😄
LikeLiked by 1 person
I have my fingers crossed that I can keep finding more muse teasing images.😁
LikeLiked by 1 person
😊I’m having such fun finding these images. Glad you like them, Linda.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Eyes the color of motor oil! I love that, Mae. 🙂
LikeLiked by 2 people
Rob, I’m so sorry, I just saw your comment. Thank you so much! I was kind of fond of that line myself 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
Not a problem, Mae. I’m the king of belated replies. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes, it’s good material for a novel, certainly. Oozing atmosphere! I don’t know how you achieve that in so few words. Fantastic!
LikeLiked by 2 people
Aww, thanks, Fred, This one is definitely going on my “to develop list.” 🙂
LikeLiked by 2 people